What men say after the work.

“Something I thought was valuable was the framework on how an emotionally intelligent conversation should go. Often going into new conversations or tough situations, I have no idea how to act and what to say. Your retreat really helped me with this.

“One of the things I like is working together with the other people who are here — pairing up with each other and doing exercises. I think it's valuable learning how to be more emotionally intelligent, but it brings you closer to other men too. You're essentially being pretty vulnerable through that, and it allows us to practice healthy vulnerability in real time.

“When I was driving here today, I was reluctant because I know trying to work on myself is hard and difficult. But when I got here, everyone was so friendly and inviting. It made a safe place to talk. I was able to put my guard down and learn new tools about coping with situations in my life.

“Before Beyond The Man Box, I didn't even know that there are tools to cope with these embarrassing incidents and situations I find myself in. And that there's an actual safe spot for men to talk about their emotions and feel it so you can work through your processes.

“I am yearning for more. I'm sad that this retreat is over. I can't wait to do another one.

“Beyond The Man Box improved my relationship. The biggest change is how I react to conflict with her. We were already in couples therapy, but through working with Beyond The Man Box I realized I needed to do a lot of work on myself, or we weren't going to make it.

“When we got into arguments, I used to think that as long as I could explain what I meant and make her understand it, she would calm down, the conversation could be over, and we could move on. That never worked. Jason taught me to start with curiosity first, rather than defending myself. By leading with curiosity, I have curiosity about my partner but also about myself. I ask myself: “What could she have been thinking?” or “Why did I react like that? What triggered me?”

“Now we have put parameters around ourselves so it does not get crazy anymore. We have a safe word for when it gets heated. I pay more attention to my body. The graphs Jason gave us have given me the opportunity to visualize and have language for the things I was feeling. If my reactions feel disproportionate, I get to ask myself things like “Am I misunderstanding this?” or “Is this bringing up something from my past?” It has helped me be a way better person and a way better boyfriend, which was my primary motivation for doing this retreat.

“After sitting down and getting into the programming, I think it's a really helpful retreat — especially for men who aren't speaking to professionals or don't have access to those types of resources. It's a really good way for us to have a chance to look more inward and do more of the inner work in a safe space.

“Being able to be vulnerable with other men in a way I've never been is what will keep me coming back. I've been around men's work spaces in the past and have not had a chance to go deeper with them in this way. I think this was a great community building experience that we don't often get. I'm really pleased.

“Beyond The Man Box has been so helpful for my emotional regulation. If I hadn't done the retreat, I would have been so furious at work last week. My colleague quit at the last minute, so I was doing the work of two people — inheriting his angry customers, managing my own accounts, training his replacement, and prepping for a full system migration. I probably worked 80 hours putting out fires.

“But to my surprise, I wasn't pissed off the whole time. Although I was exhausted by the end of the week, I had more acceptance in the moment. I wasn't explosive with my colleagues or my family, which is usually my go-to when I'm overwhelmed.

“What Jason taught us wasn't the typical “just breathe” stuff you see on TikTok. He broke down the actual science of what's happening in your brain and body when you get triggered, then gave me real tools I could use immediately in the moment.

“Now I actually understand how my nervous system works. I tighten my jaw when I'm stressed or angry, so when I notice a tight jaw, that's my warning sign that I'm about to have a reaction. Since I could see my warning signs, it gave me the power to choose how I responded instead of just having an automatic reaction that I had to apologize for later.

“Overall I really feel like the experience was welcoming. I'm more of a quiet individual so it was nice that we could speak among the group, but also in pairs. I tend to do better in smaller circles. I like that it wasn't too big — and that made me more comfortable.

“100% would do this again. I think it was really cool just being able to connect with other guys and watch other guys grow from this experience. It's a plus to just be around positive, like-minded guys where I feel we can all be open and honest and in a good mental and emotional state together.

“I did two Beyond The Man Box retreats, and they really impacted the tone of my relationship. Things had gotten rough, and my girlfriend and I were fighting a lot. Now we feel a lot closer and a lot more in love. We're spending more time together and we're communicating so much better.

“Before the retreat, I had a really hard time telling my girlfriend when I was overwhelmed in a kind way. She would often ask me for things when I was focused on something else, or stressed from work, and my immediate reaction would be to yell at her — because I just didn't know how else to express that I was overwhelmed.

“But Jason gave me way better tools to use. We role-played difficult conversations in real time, and it gave me the confidence to communicate with my girlfriend back at home. So I began to say, “Hey, I can't help you with this right now because I'm really stressed about this deadline coming up. Is there someone else who can support you?”

“I used to think saying something like that would make her angry. But actually, she really appreciated that I communicated my capacity with her. It helped her understand me better, and she felt way more respected because I wasn't blowing up. Even that one change made such a difference in my relationship.

“The role plays were my favorite part. It was an opportunity to say it once and get comfortable with it. Having uncomfortable emotional conversations is something that most of us hate doing, right? But it's necessary — and the practice was very, very powerful.

“And the discussions where we got to hear what the other guys were going through, and hear feedback from each other, were really helpful.

“It's been about two months since I did the Beyond The Man Box retreat, and I think about those sessions every day. First of all, it has made me have more empathy when I listen to people. I listen to them more, and I listen to them better.

“At work, I've been speaking my mind more to one particular person. He is excellent at his job, but often wants to do more than the client actually has money for. I've started saying: “It's great that we want to do this all, but here's the budget reality. I'd love your opinion on this.” We come to a great resolution 100% of the time.

“I've been trying to have better boundaries for myself and express them. I'm often the friend that people call to emotionally dump on about their lives, but they don't ask me about mine. I've begun to say: “I want to be there for you, but I'd also like to carve out some time today to catch you up on what's going on with me.” I'm jovial about it and kind, but I'm also sharing my needs in the conversation.

“People have responded positively, which has shown me that the reason I was resentful before was because I wasn't clearly expressing my needs. It wasn't that people were taking advantage of me.

“I usually hate role-plays, so I was dreading them. I was super uncomfortable, but Jason talked me through it. He made me feel safe to make mistakes and show my discomfort. Once we got to the other side, I felt empowered to have those conversations in my real life, and they have all gone so much better than I expected.