Awareness.
Arrive, settle, set the container. Begin with the body — learning to feel what's happening before your mind catches up. End with a clearer sense of your default pattern.
Why a Retreat
Some skills can be learned in an hour. Most can't.
The work we teach — recognizing your patterns under pressure, regulating your nervous system, staying with yourself in hard conversations — is body-level. It has to be practiced in real time, with real men, on real situations. And it has to be practiced more than once.
A retreat gives you:
- Time. Enough hours to slow down, settle in, and actually try things.
- Repetition. Each skill gets practiced multiple times, in different formats. Repetition is what builds the muscle memory.
- A container. A small group of men committed to the work, with confidentiality agreements that mean what's shared in the room stays in the room.
- Distance from your life. You can see your patterns more clearly when you step out of the situations that produce them.
The Experience
What you'll experience.
Retreats are structured around the BTMB curriculum: framework teaching, paired practice, small group work, and reflection time.
Frameworks we teach
- Trigger → Body → Emotion → Urge → Choice — the five-stage map
- The four nervous system patterns (fight, flight, freeze, fawn) and matching tools
- The Man Box patterns we were trained into
- The repair model — Regulate → Return → Repair
- The three moves for staying grounded under hard reactions
What we actually do
- Body awareness exercises — feeling what your nervous system is doing
- Paired role-plays — practicing real situations from your own life
- Coping tool drills — building muscle memory for your specific pattern
- Repair practice — working through a real conversation you've been avoiding
- Reflection time — quiet moments to integrate what's coming up
Sample Arc Day 1 Day 2 Day 3
What three days might look like.
Every retreat is slightly different. Here's the shape of a typical 3-day format.
Practice.
The deepest day. Paired exercises on real situations. Coping tool drills. Working through hard reactions. By the end of the day, you'll have a felt sense of what it's like to stay with yourself under pressure.
Integration.
Repair practice. Closing rituals. Conversations about how to take this back into your life. Specific commitments for what you'll practice in the weeks after.
Meals are shared. Mornings start slow. Evenings are open for rest, conversation, or solo time. We don't pack every minute — depth needs space.
Outcomes
What you'll leave with.
- A clear map of your nervous system patterns — when you go reactive, when you shut down, when you fawn.
- Specific body-level tools to settle yourself in real time, not after the fact.
- Language for hard moments — phrases you can actually use, not therapy-speak you'll never say.
- A repair model for when something goes sideways with someone you care about.
- A small group of men who saw you do the work — who'll still be in your corner after the retreat ends.
- At least one specific commitment for what you'll practice when you get home.
Logistics
The practical stuff.
- What's included
- Lodging, all meals, all programming and materials. The investment listed is the total — no hidden fees.
- What's not included
- Travel to and from the venue. Most retreats are accessible by car or short flight + ground transport.
- What to bring
- Comfortable clothes for movement and reflection work. A journal. An open mind. Specific packing list goes out 30 days before each event.
- Dietary needs
- We accommodate most dietary restrictions. Tell us during registration.
- Accessibility
- If you have specific accessibility needs, reach out before booking and we'll work it out.
- Substances
- Retreats are alcohol-free. We don't use plant medicines or psychedelics — they have their place, but it's not in our work.
- Phones
- We ask participants to keep phones away during sessions. Not banned outside of programming time.
Reviews
What men say after a retreat.
Alano P. retreat participant
Your retreat really helped me with how an emotionally intelligent conversation should go.Read full review
Cameron D. retreat participant
100% would do this again. It's cool just being able to connect with other guys and watch them grow.Read full review
Sabastian A. retreat participant
Being able to be vulnerable with other men in a way I've never been is what will keep me coming back.Read full review
Honest Disclaimer
Who this isn't for.
- Men in active mental health crisis. If you're suicidal or experiencing acute mental health emergency, please prioritize working with a licensed clinician. We're not a substitute.
- Men who want a quick fix. Patterns built over decades take real practice to shift. A retreat is a strong start, not the end.
- Men who don't want to engage. "Pass" is always an option, but the men who get the most out of retreats are the ones who choose to participate.
- Men looking for advice or answers. We don't tell men what to do. We help them stay regulated enough to figure it out.
- Men in active addiction. If you're early in recovery and not yet stable, please get more support before adding intensive group work.
Ready to do the work?
Pick the next step that fits where you are.