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The difficult conversation readiness check
A difficult conversation deserves more than good intentions. Eight questions to answer honestly before you bring it up — and what to do if you can't say yes to most of them.
Before you bring it up, run the check.
A difficult conversation deserves more than good intentions.
Can you honestly answer “yes” to these?
The check
- I know what I actually need.
- I can talk about what happened without attacking their character.
- I’m willing to hear something I don’t want to hear.
- I’m curious about their side of the story.
- I can stay respectful if they become emotional.
- I’m trying to understand, not win.
- I know what I want to be different after this conversation.
- I’m calm enough to choose my words instead of just reacting.
If you checked fewer than 6
You may know what you want to say.
That doesn’t mean you’re ready to say it well.
Take a moment before you begin.
The goal isn’t just to have the conversation.
It’s to handle it in a way you’ll respect afterward.